In other news

• Last weekend we was out in East Anglia for Keirsty's birthday. She only celebrated over three days, which was quite understated I feel. Happy Birthday!


• The dental floss fell into the toilet - I threw it out.


• My 10 minute bus-trip to get my haircut turned into a 40-minute trip, as a horse-drawn hearse blocked the road. Honestly, dead people have no respect for the living. And a horse-drawn hearse? What century are we in? Screw the greenhouse emissions.... I was expecting to see Emma Thompson running around in crinoline at any minute.


• I whiled away the time by reading the book the guy next to me was reading - it justified eating meat by quoting the Old Testament. I thought he might stone me if he knew I was a sinner.


• I also danced in my seat to Bananarama - to observers it probably looked like I had worms.


• I don't, but I do have tinea at the moment.


• I rang Sam (my Cypriot hairdresser (Greek-Cypriot or Turkish-Cypriot - who knows? I don't want to offend by asking.)) to apologise. He is very nice and was cool about it - he probably hangs out with George Michael smoking a drug all the time.


• At lunchtime, the guy next to me in Tesco (on the banned list, but I needed bananas), crouched down to enter his PIN, hid the keypad with his hand and kept looking around for dodgy characters. I started to giggle.